Bird Incident #1

Birds are evil, I swear they are.
I’m not really sure if I already made a post able my hatred for birds.
Yeah, I don’t care about what you have to say about them, don’t try to defend them because they are not the victim here!

I’m debating whether or not I should list my reasons for hating birds and my bird incidents in the same post or not.
Hmmm…
Okay, whatever, same post it is. It’ll just be a really lost post.
Actually no, I’m going to make them into different posts.
I’ll just save this as draft and come back to it after I finish my post about hating birds.

Okay, so I initially planned on writing three bird stories in one post but then I realized that I can just split them into separate posts to have more things to post.
Can you say GENIUS?

So here is one.
It happened when I was a child, I think I was about… 6 years old or so.
It was traumatizing.
It was in the states during the summer and I was signed up for some summer camp.
For the most part it was fun, I met some cool kids that I don’t even remember.
One evening after summer camp, I was eating Doritos-because I love food so sue me-outside with my aunts and cousins just because we could.
The summer camp was by some ocean, beach, lake thing where we occasionally went to row.

Oh, that reminds me of another traumatizing story, which was somewhat overcome but not really.Anyways, that’s besides the point.
I’m just casually standing there, MINDING MY OWN FUCKING BUSINESS when seagulls approach me and think it’s fucking funny to steal food from a fucking 6 year old.
Way to go seagulls, you are officially bullies.
Well, I’m not really sure they’re seagulls, but they were birds, fucking birds.
Within like 2 seconds I have a clan of birds surrounding me.
And like any NORMAL 6 year old, I start panicking.
I’m trying to run, BUT WHERE CAN I RUN TO, THEY’RE FUCKING SURROUNDING ME.
At this point my aunt is telling me to drop my bag of Doritos so that they can leave me alone.
But what do I do?
I’m all “NO, IT’S MY DORITOS, TELL THEM TO GET THEIR OWN!!!!!!!”
And I think my aunt kind of gave up on me.
Sheesh, sorry for being a fat child.
And I think this elevated my fear/hate for birds.
Fucking birds, fucking bullies.

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